Wedding planning isn’t just about picking table cloth colors and pulling together a guest list. Wedding planning is about planning for the day that is just the beginning of your lives together. Getting engaged gives you some time to prepare for marriage. A successful marriage requires a lot more planning than just planning the day of your wedding.
To make sure you are building the strongest foundation from the start, there are a few things that I think are important to squeeze into your time as an engaged couple in between table layouts and cocktail selections.
Ask the Tough Questions
Someone recommended “Lies at the Alter” by Dr. Robin Smith to me when I was engaged and it was one of the best purchases I have made ever. I have recommended this book to every friend of mine as soon as they got engaged.
This book covers all the most important topics that you and your partner should cover before heading into your wedding day. The last pages in the book break out over 100 questions by topic. I would suggest breaking the questions up into a few date nights and just go down the list of questions with your partner, discussing each one. You will both have a good idea of what to expect from one another in a number of different scenarios that you may face as a married couple. While you may have already discussed many of the questions, it can’t hurt to open these topics back up for discussion. Some of the questions are tough, and maybe not the most fun to talk about. However, you should be able to talk to your partner about even the toughest of topics before heading for the alter!
Decide on Whether You Want a Prenup
Prenups aren’t for everyone. However, prenups are definitely something you and your partner should talk about and decide on together. I am not a lawyer, so this is not legal advice. I suggest you seek legal advice to fully understand whether a prenup makes sense for you. My recommendation is that you fully understand what the pros and cons of a prenup are for you specific situation. Some of the factors that affect the decision you make regarding a prenup are:
- The assets you have prior to marriage
- Whether you have children or have been divorced
- Whether you have debt or your partner has any debt
Attend Premarital Counseling
Counseling is always a good idea because it provides a neutral third party to help through some of life’s toughest problems. It is hard to predict what life will throw your way as newlyweds, but being as prepared as you can is always a good idea. Premarital counseling can help set expectations for the ups and downs of marriage and mentally prepare you and your partner for this new chapter. This is another way to also talk through some of the tougher topics that you and your partner may shy away from without the help of a third party.
Premarital counseling can sometimes be found through spiritual organizations in your area.
The wedding is just the first day of your lives together, so plan for it all!
xHappy Planning Bride Babes!x
